Editor’s note:
This holiday favorite is back by popular demand;
i.e., one person asked for it.

The Night Before Christmas

by Michel Robertson
(with apologies to Clement Clarke Moore)

‘Twas the night before Christmas in our little town.
The sheriff was making his Christmas Eve rounds.
The streets were deserted, the tourists were home.
The shops were all empty. He was quite alone.

The Vet’rans museum on twenty-one Main
Was closed up and locked — or so someone claimed.
When all of a sudden a shrill filled the air.
The museum’s alarm woke the town with a BLARE.

The Mayor arrived in response to the clatter.
Policemen rushed in, yelling “What is the matter?”
The Sheriff responded, “We have an intruder!
He’s in the big room. He might be a looter!”

They crept down the hallway, their guns at the ready.
“Be careful,” the chief warned. “Now steady, boys, steady.”
As they rounded the corner, their backs to the wall,
They saw that it wasn’t a thief – not at all!

A jolly old fat man in red was asleep —
He was taking a nap in the old Willys Jeep.
He awoke with a start and said, “Boys hold your fire!
“It’s been a long night, and Rudolph is tired.

“The reindeer are sleeping outside on the lawn.
“If I borrow this Jeep, I’ll be back before dawn.”
So he loaded the Willys with gifts from the sleigh,
Shouting “HO HO HO HO,” he was up and away!
And we heard him exclaim as he roared out of sight,
“Thanks for your service and to all a good night!”